Greg Bean

Coda

Coyote was just taking

a nice walk in the park

I was listening to the folks on National Public Radio last Wednesday morning, talking about the poor coyote that authorities were chasing around New York's Central Park with helicopters, tranquilizer darts and the like, and I wondered why they just didn't let the critter be.

There's no telling how the misguided animal ended up there, but when you think about it, Central Park is just about the perfect place for a coyote.

For one thing, it's a virtual smorgasbord of all the things coyotes need to make a living - ducks and mice, squirrels and chipmunks, pigeons and rats and geese. Given that much variety in the kinds of food coyotes love, there's very little chance they'll start eating humans, or even toy poodles, so the canine wouldn't pose much of a threat.

Left to his or her own devices, that coyote, a shy animal by nature, would probably spend the rest of its life roaming Central Park, thinning the bird population and growing absolutely obese without bothering a single human being.

For another, it's good for our collective souls to know that even in the midst of a civilization as dense as New York City, a little bit of the wild can survive and prosper.

That's the same rationale that led to the reintroduction of wolves into the Yellowstone Park ecosystem and the efforts to bring back populations of grizzly bears and bald eagles. And when you remember how excited New Yorkers got over a couple of hawks nesting outside an apartment building, you've got to think they'd be purely ecstatic over a coyote in the park.

After a while, maybe that coyote could invite a few friends over and form a pack. Then, after dark, people could sit on the benches and listen to the coyotes howl. They could close their eyes and imagine that instead of being surrounded by a sea of concrete, traffic noise and people, they are alone on the great prairies of a century ago.

Heaven, right?

So I say, let that coyote go (it's been captured and is in a holding facility). And if they can't do that for some reason, pack it up and send it over here to New Jersey (Population: 8.5 million people, 37 billion geese). As long as it doesn't move into my garage like one recent uninvited guest (a possum), it'll be fine.

One other thing, however. Where I come from, only tenderfeet and NPR announcers from "Back East" pronounce the name of these creatures kai-yoat-ees, unless they're talking about Wile E. Coyote of cartoon fame or someone who's kai-yoat-ee ugly.

In the West, where the majority of these animals still roam free, coyote is pronounced kai-oat.

Talk about a kai-yoat-ee out there in coyote country, and someone will immediately recognize you for a dude - a Soda Pop Kid, an Urban Cowboy - and start trying to sell you jackalope steaks.

It's the verbal equivalent of tucking your pants into the tops of your boots, saying "Whee, doggies!" and wearing a hat with so many feathers in the hat band that it looks like the result of a head-on, high-speed collision between a peacock and a Stetson.

So say it with me ... kai-oat. Kai-oat. Coyote.

See, that wasn't so bad. And it didn't sound nearly as silly.

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Wall Watch Week 10

It's now been over 10 weeks since Holmdel Committeeman Terence Wall turned on his running mate, Mayor Serena DiMaso, and accused her of making anti-Semitic comments, which he claimed to have on tape. It's been over 10 weeks since DiMaso energetically denied the allegation in a press release, mentioned a long history of Wall's alleged skullduggery, and called on him to resign. It's been over 10 weeks since I made the same call in this column.

I continue to hear from Holmdel residents cheering this Wall Watch, but I had just about decided to let it rest and go on to other matters. Then, two things happened to make me change my mind.

First, Wall announced his intention to run for Monmouth County freeholder.

Second, he sent an e-mail to all the managing editors who work for Greater Media (except me) claiming that my Wall Watch is false because DiMaso has made "no demand for proofs on any issue, either public or private," regarding Wall's production of the tape. "Facts are important," Wall wrote, explaining the purpose of his e-mail to the editors.

In reviewing all that's been printed on this subject since the controversy first erupted, it turns out that on this point, at least, Wall is right. Although DiMaso did call on him to resign for making the damaging charges, it was I who wrote that if he did not, or could not, produce the tape, then he should do the right thing and quit.

I made that call in the first column I wrote about the allegations, and in subsequent columns I erred in writing that DiMaso had demanded that Wall either produce the tape, or resign. In fact, she had only demanded he resign, but for some reason I thought I remembered that she had demanded he produce the tape as well.

I know this sounds like splitting hairs, and it is. But when you make a mistake, even a minor one, you should own up to it.

Now, the ball's in Wall's court. My initial challenge stands. It's time for him to produce that tape, if it exists, and put this matter to rest. If the tape hasn't been doctored and conclusively shows DiMaso made anti-Semitic comments, then she should resign. If Wall can't produce the evidence to back up his incendiary charges, then he should resign.

And he should drop out of the race for Monmouth County freeholder as well.

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I've already received several thoughtful responses to last week's column regarding senior citizens and the sometimes crushing burden of the taxes they pay to fund education. Some of those responses will appear in the paper as letters to the editor and some won't because they were intended as personal messages. Thanks to my readers, however, for getting the discussion started, and for letting me know my unoriginal idea of reduced education taxes for seniors isn't as farfetched as some people believe.

Gregory Bean is executive editor of Greater Media Newspapers.